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@goatsarah They've clearly not been victims themselves. I was, at the beginning of the year - by a covert N. They're insidious as it takes some time to realise what they are. I served as a voluntary therapist to a covert N and she thanked me with endless criticism. As soon as I told her anything about my life, she'd use "her depression" as an excuse not to listen. When I plucked up the courage politely call her out, she went around falsely accusing me of harassment
@goatsarah she kept repeatedly accusing others of lacking empathy - which her own mother described as "laughable, because she doesn't have any empathy herself". Thankfully, people saw through her lies about me and she was banned from our local LGBT community. But it turned out very differently when I was 19 & still at uni, much less mature, and having inadvertently offended a covert N. Lesson learned: ask yourself how this person makes you feel, don't just listen to words.